Rod Blagojevich Reveals Prison Tattoo that ‘Won Trump Over’

Sometimes a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do

CHICAGO — Former Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich (Blago) is slowly speaking out about his time in the clink and one thing he revealed was the prison tattoo that he claims won over President Donald Trump and convinced him to issue a pardon.

Blago was sentenced to 14 years, but only served seven years and some change thanks to Trump’s commutation of his sentence. Insiders have long suspected that there was something special in the relationship between the former governor and the man who fired him from “Celebrity Apprentice” some years ago. And now we know: It was a tat.

The most revealing memory Blago has of prison is the tattoo he got as part of his initiation into the gang of people who commit non-violent white collar crimes. This tattoo, Blago claims, helped get him into the super-secret “Adoration Society,” a collective of former political figures now behind bars who claimed allegiance to the Democrat Party but, in reality, are closet supporters of the president.

“Look, it’s prison, man, and all that that implies,” Blago said. “I will be eternally grateful for the president for what he did — he didn’t have to, ya know — but that said, I had no problem permanently changing my body in order to suck up to the guy who humiliated me on national TV.”

When he was asked how the president found out about his ‘Trump Tramp Stamp,’ Blagojevich smiled slightly and said, “Well, you know, I was in prison. I wasn’t dead. These things have a way of, um, working themselves out.”

The White House had no comment.

As for Blagojevich, now that he is a free man and no longer liable for serving out his original sentence, he said he planned on keeping the prison ink.

“No way I’ll ever remove this,” he said. “No way.”

Continuing, he said cryptically, “Because, you know, I might just want to get back into politics. And everyone knows this is a ticket to the inside. I might, uh, you know, need a little ‘help’ again in the future, knowwhatImean?”

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