Tom Brady leaving New England Patriots to be a starter for cruise ship shuffleboard league

BOSTON — After 20 seasons, legendary NFL quarterback and first-round Hall of Famer Tom Brady will be leaving the New England Patriots, but instead of heading to another football team, he’ll be taking on professional shuffleboard.

Brady has signed with the National Shuffleboard Association (NSA), a cruise ship-based league with a growing collection of senior citizen athletes.

“I though long and hard about this decision for the past couple of years, and I figured I have already won more Super Bowls than any other NFL quarterback can over hope to win, so I want to go master another sport,” Brady said as he cleaned out his locker at Gillette Stadium.

“I chose the NSA because, like me, the league is super-competitive, it’s an up-and-coming sport, and I get to work on my tan while I’m actually ‘at the office,'” the long-time franchise QB said. “Never really could work on a tan in Boston, you know? The winters there are pretty harsh.”

Asked about his contract, Brady was coy but did say it was “a multi-year and high five-figures,” with a $10,000 signing bonus and a guaranteed $3,000 minimum salary.

“I realize that Americans are probably going to get more than that in a coronavirus payout, but for me, it’s about the sport, not the money,” Brady — who’ll be starting lead shuffler for the Caribbean Croakers — said.

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