White House to open ‘Office of Democrat Anger Management’ to ease outrage over Trump policies

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In an effort to combat “Trump Derangement Syndrome” and constant partisan outrage over each of the president’s policies, the administration has opened a new “Office of Democrat Anger Management.”

KellyAnne Conway, the president’s top counselor, said she got the idea last week in the face of Democrat fury after Trump said he “absolutely” would serve all four years of a second term if he’s reelected in November.

“You know, Democrats seem to have issues with everything this president does, including waking up in the morning and taking his first breath,” Conway told a press gaggle in the Rose Garden.

“But we don’t want to see anyone perpetually angry all the time, especially when things are going so well in the country,” Conway continued. “Thus, we believe the new Office of Democrat Anger Management will help the president’s most vociferous political opponents learn to chill out and realize that he’s not trying to tick them off.”

When asked who would likely be among the office’s first clients, Conway declined to name names.

“Let’s just say there are plenty of Democrats already lined up to being therapy,” she said. “I may even make my husband attend.”

Reminded that husband George Conway is a registered Republican, the president’s counselor was dismissive.

“I think I know him better than you do,” she said.

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