Kim Jong-un found working at same Montana convenience store as Elvis

FORSYTH — After days of speculation about his health, North Korean dictator Kim Jong-un has been discovered working at a rural Montana convenience store with rock-and-roll legend Elvis Pressly.

Store owner Maggie Dalton says the leader of the secretive Asian country just showed up a few days ago looking for a job, where Elvis has been employed as chief clerk for years.

“I know the rumors are that he had some heart surgery trouble but that was just a cover story,” Dalton said. “When you’re the leader of a nasty little place like that and always in the spotlight, you can’t just ‘disappear.’ There’s gotta be a cover story, and usually one about ill-health is best.

“After all, it’s worked for The King all these years, hasn’t it?” she continued, a reference to Elvis. “I’m not surprised these two have been discovered, though. You know, you can’t hide forever.

“Elvis had a pretty good run, but I guess now the little guy from North Korea’s going to have to face the world again now that he’s been discovered,” said Dalton. “Too bad, really. He may have been used to giving orders all the time, but he takes ’em from Elvis pretty good, too. Must just be the authoritarian mentality.”

Asked if she’ll have to hire new help sooner rather than later, Dalton sighed and said, “Looks like it.”

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