WASHINGTON, D.C. — As the government shutdown drags into its 13th day, lawmakers on both sides of the aisle proudly confirmed playing the “blame game” remains the strongest bipartisan tradition in the nation’s capital.
Speaking from the steps of the Capitol, Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer (D-NY) declared, “This shutdown is entirely the Republicans’ fault — and I say that with the kind of conviction that only comes from someone who has voted against reopening the government six times in a row.”
House Speaker Mike Johnson (R-LA) quickly fired back, insisting the GOP “is united in its total lack of responsibility.” He added, “If Democrats think they can corner the market on finger-pointing, they’re sorely mistaken. We’ve got decades of experience in that field.”
Sources inside both chambers described the atmosphere as “weirdly cooperative,” with members of Congress taking turns drafting press releases that carefully balance outrage with self-congratulation.
“We’re working together — finally — to make sure the American people know this is all the other guy’s fault,” said Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-SC), clutching a Starbucks cup labeled Accountability-Free Zone. “Frankly, it’s beautiful to see unity again.”
Meanwhile, President Donald Trump weighed in from Truth Social, posting: “Shutdowns are good for the soul. Makes Congress think about what they’ve done. Sad!”
Outside the Capitol, furloughed federal workers expressed mixed feelings. “I’m glad to see bipartisanship returning to Washington,” said one unpaid park ranger. “I just wish it didn’t come at the expense of my rent.”
As negotiations stall, both parties agreed to schedule more press conferences and fewer meetings. “We’ll get through this together,” Schumer assured reporters. “Just not that together.”
